Ean Hancement v Johnny Drinko : Career v Fannypacks

Johnny Drinko vs Ean Hancement at Entertania VII

Johnny Drinko vs Ean Hancement at Entertania VII

One of the more twisted tales we’ve been told to tell, so goes the story of what may be the end of The CAUTION (CAUTION).


Ean Hancement, Anton Voorhees and DARK Sheik were 3/3rds of the most arm breaking group in Hoodslam history. Batmanuel, El Sparko, Juiced Lee, Charlie Chaplin: all had to take a broken wing and learn to fly again. Ean and Sheik held a firm grip on The Best Athlete in the Eastbay Golden Fannypacks. Anton had his sights on the Golden Gig.


But as swiftly as the tides rises, it breaks and pulls back; DARK Sheik was revealed to be a broken robot, built to resemble the original Sheik who’d been lost in the dimensional portal accidentally created by Doc Atrocity 4 years ago. Johnny Drinko and Anton Voorhees battled over the Gig so often, they both focused on each other and neither could dethrone the Champions, Drugz Bunny or subsequently PONG. The Best Athlete Award was lost, and the finish line to the Golden Gig rapidly diminished in the horizon…


Anton, coming to terms with his partners robotic shortcomings, agreed to a deal with Doc Atrocity: he would hand deliver the Best Athlete Fannypacks, and the Dr would fix the inoperative DARK Sheik to function once more. Anton would win the Fannypacks, but before they could be delivered, they were stolen by Johnny Drinko. With no physical title, Doc decreed the deal incomplete.


Im a fit of madness, Anton hurled himself through Doc Atrocity’s dimensional portal, in an insane attempt to find the original organic DARK Sheik that had been lost to the multiverse 4 years ago. Doc could retrieve him, he told Ean, but he still wants those Fannypacks.


Johnny Drinko delighted in the mental collapse of his enemy Anton. He relished in the breakdown of the robotic DARK Sheik. Without wrestling a match, he had won the silent war with The CAUTION. Except one last thread…or third.


Ean Hancement finds himself in a pickle; he must attain Fannypacks to either fix his robotic mentor or return his human friend- Doc Atrocity will only do one favor. But first he must get Drinko to return the Golden Fannypacks – technically still belonging to absent-from-this-dimension Anton Voorhees. Johnny Drinko made another deal: he’ll return the Fannypacks to Ean so he can make his choice IF Ean beats Drinko at Entertania VII.


But if Drinko wins, Ean must leave Hoodslam, and The CAUTION will be erased forever…gone with the tide.