Friday, July 1, 2016
Oakland Metro Opera House
Paid attendance: 652
Live commentary by “Broseph” Joe Brody.
Tonight’s musical guest was Topless Jefferson.
1. Top of the SkyDreamers Miracle Ecstasy Cup Double Chaos Redondo of Blood Round-Robin Intergalactic Tag Team Championship Tournament match: James C. & Juice Lee def. The New U (Shotzi Blackheart and “Bonus Boy” Bobby Burgerhands, with Coach Joey Nuggs) to earn 10 points.
2. BBQ Brawl Independeath Day Death Match: The PB&J Banana def. The Hot Dog Frank Mayer.
3. Top of the SkyDreamers Miracle Ecstasy Cup Double Chaos Redondo of Blood Round-Robin Intergalactic Tag Team Championship Tournament match: The Stoner Brothers (Rick-Scott Stoner and Scott-Rick Stoner) and Virgil Flynn II & “The Mexican Werewolf” El Chupacabra wrestled to a 20-minute time-limit draw. Both teams earned five points.
4. Best Athlete in the East Bay Golden Fannypacks tag-team match: The Caution (CAUTION! DARK Sheik and “The Talent” Ean Hancement, champions) def. Cereal Man and “Ultragirl” Brittany Wonder to retain the Best Athlete in the East Bay Golden Fannypacks due to interference from “The Hero of HIGHrule” Link, who joined DARK Sheik and Ean Hancement as the third member of The Caution (CAUTION!)
5. Six-pack challenge elimination match to become the number one contender for the Golden Gig: “The Dark Noche” Bat Manuel def. Johnny “Drinko” Butabi, Evil Ryu, “The Russian Lover” Zangief, Ken (with Cammy and Cammy’s Ass), and “The Hero of HIGHrule” Link to become the new number one contender for the Golden Gig. Following the match all three thirds of The Caution (CAUTION!) viciously assaulted Bat Manuel.
6. Golden Gig Championship: Anthony Butabi def. “The Rabbit With a Habit” Drugz Bunny to win the Golden Gig. Referee Guido, accidentally blinded by cocaine, counted Drugz Bunny’s shoulders to the mat when Johnny “Drinko” Butabi made the cover on Drugz Bunny. The decision was reversed when Hoodslam Señor Official El Sparko realized that it was not Anthony Butabi who scored the pinfall. The match was restarted and “The Rabbit With a Habit” Drugz Bunny def. Anthony Butabi to retain the Golden Gig.
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Hoodslam runs at the Oakland Metro Opera House every first Friday and will return on Friday, August 5 for Hoodslam: Battle Royal of Supremacy.
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