Best Athlete in the East Bay

After fans voted Hoodslam wrestler Sheik Khan Adabi the 2012 East Bay Express Best Athlete and even beating out Oakland A’s players, this prestigious award recognizes the finest athletic achievements in the East Bay. The title of Best Athlete in the East Bay is coveted by every wrestler in Hoodslam.

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October 5th, 2012 – Dark Sheik successfully defended his “East Bay Express: Best Athlete Award” against The Karate Kid.

November 2nd, 2012 – DARK Sheik defeated El Chupacabra and successfully defended the East Bay Express Readers Choice Award for Best Athlete in the East Bay (Tied with Tim Thompson).

December 7th, 2012 – DARK Sheik w/D. Faust defeated Grand Master G, Stoney Montana, and Ultragirl Brittany Wonder to retain the award of reader voted Best Athlete in the Bay.

Febuary 1st, 2013 – DARK Sheik w/ D. Faust successfully defended his East Bay ExpressBest Athlete Award against Virgil Flynn III, El Chupacabra, Otis the Gimp, Gorilla Vinny Butabi, Ultragirl Brittany Wonder and Butternuts in a 15 minute Scramble. Post match, DARK Sheik retired the Award.

June 7th, 2013 – Virgil Flynn defeated Dark Sheik (w/D. Faust) with a 450 splash to become the new Best Athlete in the East Bay (tied with Tim Thompson) after cashing in his Kat Williams Memorial Battle Bowl Championship.

July 5th, 2013 – Virgil Flynn III defeated Cousin Balki Butabi w/ Officer Foxy.

September 6th, 2013 – Virgil Flynn III beat El Chupacabra (w/Courtney Crimson and Doc Atrocity) with a top-rope 450 splash to retain.

October 4th, 2013 – Virgil Flynn III def. Johhny “Drinko” Butabi via pinfall with a 450 splash to retain the “Best Athlete in the East Bay” award.

November 1st, 2013 – EBX Best Athlete Virgil Flynn defeated “Psycho Shooter” Drake Younger in a Match Of The Year candidate.

December 6th, 2013 – Virgil Flynn III beat Soundwave with a 450 splash to retain the Best Athlete in the East Bay Award.

January 3rd, 2014 – Virgil Flynn III beat “The New Age Punisher” B-Boy to retain the Best Athlete in the East Bay Award. Flynn won with an inside cradle.

February 7th, 2014 – Virgil Flynn III def. Bat Manuel with the 450 splash to retain the Best Athlete in the East Bay Golden Fannypack.

March 7th, 2014 – Virgil Flynn III beat James C. with the 450 splash to retain the Best Athlete in the East Bay award.

April 4th, 2014 – Virgil Flynn III beat Drugz Bunny with a 450-splash followed by the Cannonball senton to retain the Best Athlete in the East Bay Award.

May 2nd, 2014 – Virgil Flynn III beat Ryu with a 450-splash, immediately followed by the Cannonball senton, to retain the Best Athlete in the East Bay Award.

June 6th, 2014 – F.O.N.G. (F’n Obese Nerdy Gamer w/P.O.N.G.) beat Drugz Bunny and Virgil Flynn III in a three-way match to become the new Best Athlete in the East Bay. Virgil hit the 450 splash on Drugz Bunny and made the cover. With señor official, El Sparko’s vision impaired due to a cocaine malfunction, when F.O.N.G. laid on top of Virgil, who was covering Drugz Bunny, El Sparko did not see Virgil underneath F.O.N.G. and counted the pinfall, awarding the match to F.O.N.G., ending Virgil Flynn III’s year-plus reign as Best Athlete in the East Bay.

 

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F.O.N.G. (Fucking Obese Nerdy Gamer) is the current holder of the Golden Fannypack, after defeating Virgil Flynn III. He proudly holds this title because wearing it around his waist is an impossible feat even for the mystic powers of the Goldn Fannypack, proving that athletic prowess also comes in extra large.

June 20th, 2014 – F.O.N.G. (F’n Obese Nerdy Gamer w/P.O.N.G.) beat Mega Man with the fat splash on top of the Mario Kart spiked turtle shell to retain the Best Athlete in the East Bay Award.

July 4th, 2014 – F.O.N.G. (F’ing Obese Nerdy Gamer) defeats Jesus Kruze

November 7th, 2014 – Cereal Man beat F.O.N.G. (F’n Obese Nerdy Gamer w/P.O.N.G. – Pissed Off Nerdy Gamer) with the Atomic Leg Drop. Immediately afterward, the referee reversed the decision when he found a foreign object on Cereal Man, planted by P.O.N.G. F.O.N.G. is still the best athlete in the East Bay.

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February 6th, 2015 – Best Athlete in the East Bay co-championship: Sheik (Link dressed as Zelda dressed as Sheik) from Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time def. Fucking Obese Nerdy Gamer with an Iron Boot double stomp to become co-holder of the Best Athlete in the East Bay Award.